Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Structuring a Family

Polygyny is permitted in Islam because it is more matriarchal; the male has the right to marry four different women. The reason for this is because of the percentage difference in the number of males and females in the world and also to spread Islam. There are a number of different ways in which a woman and man are destined. In Qatar the most popular ways to get married is either based on arranged or love marriages.

Arranged marriage VS. Love marriage, as many may call it, give connotations of being happy and unhappy. The word arranged seems like as if the couple have no choice, being a trap, whereas love suggests happiness and long lasting.

In this generation, marriage has become different. This is mainly because of the development of Qatar, men and women seem to socialize more and gender interaction has increased. Therefore men and women meet in a number of different places which includes the university, workplace and many more. As a result of this development, young singles begin to think, why should I follow these traditions? Their mentality on marriage has changed due to their surroundings and they seek to marry someone they choose rather than their family choice.

Still, the marriage decisions differ from family to family. To some, marriage partners have been appointed ever since they were children, especially children the same age group. This is due to bringing families’ closer and for the continuance of the bloodline, which is considered arranged marriage.

Another form of arranged marriage is when the male chooses the specifications of the wife he wants; these specifications may include appearance, ethnicity, age, education level etc. The male’s mother begins to search by asking friends and family or even by looking at girls they think are suitable in places such as weddings, dinner parties, gatherings etc. Before anything is official and before the mother talk’s to the girls parents, she usually asks the male for his opinion before anything is official.

Nowadays, in Qatar, you can judge the success of a marriage based on the rate of divorce. Articles show that Qatar has one of the highest rates of divorce in the World. Many may perceive it as being the result of an arranged marriage and others see it as the interference of the parents in the couple’s relationship.

A number of reasons could result in divorce. These include; the social conflict caused by exogamy, with constant interference from the society and family. Another reason could be because of marriage based on love, one or both of the couples did not consider family responsibility and only based their marriage on love. Furthermore, other purposes for divorce is the result of arranged marriage, the couple did not get the chance to get to know each other before marriage therefore it resulted in a lack of communication and they may not share the same interests. Many possibilities can be the cause of unsuccessful marriages, whether from arranged or love. Also, vice versa, the success of a marriage can be either from love or arranged marriage as well.

This video shows the seriousness of arranged marriage - "a daughter's refusal to stay in an arranged marriage led to her death and resulted in her father's arrest". It shows to what extreme some cultures or families follow their traditions.

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