Women are being judged!

In our last sociology class we learned about the family and how the gender roles might affect the relationship of the family members. But what was interesting to know is that each member of the family does his/her role depending on what’s the society expects from them. However, since the role of women outside the house has changed, this has led to the secondary shift. In the book Cinematic Sociology written by Jean-Anne Sutherland, Kathryn Feltey they described the second shift to be a job for all working women where they get to do household after they are done with their working day.    

Breadwinner system dose not apply to families of 21^st century

The breadwinner system is a system where men are the only providers of money for the family. But this system no longer describes families of the 21^st century. Women today might earn more than men. And the main reason why women work today its because of the economic conditions. Parents with one income simply can’t support their family, thus women work to provide the second income for the family.

It is the expectations of the society

In the past few years we can see a significant changes in the role of women out side the house, but what about the roles of men inside the house! Surprisingly, though women are helping in earning money role of men inside the house did not change very much. Mostly because of society expectations, it’s perceived as women’s roles to take care of the house, thus men don’t help inside the house.

Women in Gulf

Though the role of women have changed in the gulf in the past few years, yet society especially older generations will perceive working woman care less about her family. In the gulf, people are still not convinced that woman can be a workingwoman and a mother! But since work gives a woman a feeling of security and she will be earning money to support her family, this makes her care more about her family. So women are being judged because it is expected from them to take care of the family not the men.   

Breadwinners and Homemakers

The family usually divides the work between them, wives and husbands. Two terms must be defined that describe the couple’s roles. The first term is the breadwinner system, it describes the husband who works and earns income to support the entire nuclear family. The other term is the homemaker, it describes the wife who stays at home and does the domestic duties.

The Traditional Breadwinner and Homemaker

The traditional family consists of the breadwinner husband and the homemaker wife. In this patriarchal society, the husband is the head of the family and holds the power, because he has the ability to provide money or food for his wife and children. The traditional breadwinner husband seems to have the cultural respect. On the other hand, the homemaker wife usually lacks of control over one’s work, because she has to spend her day at home taking care of the house and the children.  

Breadwinner Wife and Homemaker Husband

In this system, the husbands and wives switch their roles, as the wife becomes the breadwinner by going out to the work, while the husband stays at home taking care of the children and do the domestic duties.

Since this system is out of expectation, husbands who are laid off or do not work tend to do less homework. This is because husband is expected to be the breadwinner not a homemaker, as he feels his masculinity is being under threatened. In this particular situation, some households may have some tension because of switching of the roles between the husband and the wife. The fact of nobody wants to feel useless, unappreciated and overloaded. Everyone wants a consequential work, so this lead to both of the couples be in the working field.

Families of the 21^st Century

In the last generation, it is noticed that many women are moving to the working field. Many women don’t want to continue what their mothers did, being homemakers. They are bored from cleaning, washing and doing all other house duties plus taking care of the children. Today’s women have other priorities other than marriage. Most of the women want to study in universities and have different degrees. Moreover, men in those days want to get married to those who are with graduated from universities, so that they have the opportunity to work. Husbands support their wives to work now a days to help their husbands from the income perspectives and to get the best for their kids. This situation may not matter to husbands with high income, but still women want to show themselves outside the house area.

The secondary shift

In sociology, the secondary shift known as the jobs that working wives do to run the household after they finish the workday. In Cinematic Sociology book, it indicates three types of couples. The first type is the traditional couple, in which both of the couples work outside the house for wages, but it is expected from wives to complete their domestic duties once they come back home. Besides, it is expected from husbands to their traditional duties such as handling the car problems. The second type is transitional; in which the husbands help their wives in the domestic duties. The third type is egalitarian; in which the couples divide the domestic duties between them. However, most of the times the wives have the majority of work, because they have the ability to organize and make all the work is done. The secondary shift helps both of the couples to drop their stress and both of them are benefiting from this arrangement to have a successful happily marriage life.

TV Series - Shaping the evolution of behaviors?

Recently I was re-watching a TV show I used to love a few years back. 8 simple rules is an American comedy that went on from 2002 - 2005. While watching this show I noticed the family’s situation, and the first thing I could think of was the breadwinner system, and how this show defied it. The breadwinner system basically states that since the dawn of time, the man has always been that one that earns money to feed the family, while the woman stays at home and takes care of the kids and the housework.





For those of you who don’t know this show, it’s about a family of five, the parents, two girls, and a boy. The parents are trying to control their two teenage girls, while juggling work at the same time. But, opposite to the belief of the breadwinner system, this TV show does it differently. The mother is a workingwoman that sometimes has morning and night shifts in the same day. The father has a job too; but he works from home as a sports writer for a newspaper, and he’s the one who’s responsible for taking care of the kids, and sometimes cooking and cleaning. However, when the mother comes back from work, she is still expected to make dinner and clean.





A decade ago TV series like this one were viewed mostly in the west. When people watch TV shows that challenge and change social norms, eventually over time based on the cultivation theory, these new ways of living portrayed on television, become the social norm. This is one of the many reasons for this change.

Similarly, when we started watching these shows in the Middle East, the same thing began to happen. We started challenging these social norms, changing them, and calling it “modernization”. Due to the fact that not a lot of people in the Middle East speak English, only the ones that do have received this ideology from TV series. That is the reason why this new way of life hasn’t spread as much as it has in the west. However, I do believe that in the near future this change will spread drastically in the Middle East just like it has in the west.

Who Run The World (Girls)

My title may suggest that girls have it all, success, power and of course love. However, I really just picked the title because I love Beyonce so much!




In our last Sociology class, we have discussed how families are considered as element of socialization and how gender roles can affect the stability of families and relationships. We also looked closely into the breadwinner system and discussed the elements of changes and continuity regarding the system.

Due to the rise of literacy rates amongst women and with more women entering the workforce, more women are becoming the breadwinners in their place, which has shaken up the system. Men are no longer perceived as the main provider for the household; in fact, many women began earning more than men do. Men are doing more housework than they ever had (watching a game and playing X-Box all does not count). Many couples are succumbing to the changes mainly because of the recent economic conditions. On the other hand, there is still cultural resistance and stigma towards men being the secondary earners in the household, which has discouraged many men from dating or marrying successful women.

There are two main reasons why successful women remain single, they are either too busy working and achieving their goals or they are seen as "high maintenance" by men. Men are often intimidated by women who are better than them financially and career wise. This whole "Beauty fades, but personality and brains last forever" just doesn't seem to cut it anymore. Of course, many successful men look for women are equally successful and smart in order for them to support themselves in their social and professional circles. There has been many cases where marriages have been ruined due to the wife having a more successful career, and it usually happens when the in-laws or the public interfere and comment on their situation. Most of the middle-eastern men were brought up in a house where the mom was a stay-at-home mom and the father being the breadwinner. However, many of them are pro-feminism and demand equality for women. 

What happened to "Behind every successful man is a woman"?

One thing about Middle-Eastern men, they will never let you pay the bill just because they're men.

Why are women still single then? Frankly, because some of them choose to be. What bothers in me in our society is how people contradict themselves when it's a stigma for girls to remain unmarried and for men to marry girls who are more successful (or the breadwinner) in the family. Successful, ambitious and more educated girls are then forced to stay single because they haven't found an equivalent companion.
Even though feminism is perceived as a western ideology, many westerners are highly against it simply because they're men.

Shame!

BIGGER SHAME!!

What Choices Do Single Saudi Arabian Mothers Have?

Note: Throughout this blog, I refer to single mothers. This includes both divorced mothers and widowed mothers.

      In the previous week's sociology class, family work dynamics were discussed, particularly how work impacts the family and how outside forces impact work in the family. In this blog post, I will investigate the role of work in the families of single Saudi Arabian mothers. In order to analyze this phenomenon, though, one must first understand both past and recent variations in general family work dynamics.

      The most significant outside force to first impact work is the industrial revolution. The revolution changed what was commonly home-based work in farms to factory work, which may have distanced and maybe even severed familial relations with the patriarch (or the father) due to long hours of work away from home. This has lead to today's predominant breadwinner system, a system in which the man works to support the entire family while the woman is left as the primary caregiver.

Source

      Recent socioeconomic changes in today's world have caused even stronger and more complex changes to how work functions in familial contexts. Due to recent economic crises and increasingly high financial demands, the breadwinner system no longer sufficiently provides for an entire family. Instead, one often finds that both parents work now, particularly in Western countries such as the United States of America or France. As divorce becomes more socially acceptable in such countries, one also finds an increase in divorce rates, which are also catalyzed by other socioeconomic factors.

Source

      Different cases or arrangements of the function of work in the family lead to different advantages and concerns. When both parents work, surely the family gains more financial stability, but that could be at the expense of bonding with one's child/children and maybe even partner, which could lead to tension and dissonance in familial relations. Single mothers also find themselves having to fulfill the role of both the caregiver mother and breadwinner father. These are merely a few examples of the many influences variations in work could affect the family.

      The aforementioned examples all have a variable degree of choice from at least one aspect. One could argue, for instance, that single mothers chose divorce. In the case of single (or widowed) Saudi Arabian mothers, though, choice is a factor that has long been unfamiliar. One can quickly assume that in the severely patriarchal (or male-dominant) Saudi Arabian society, restrictions are bound to be placed upon this particular type of women. What one may not easily understand, though, is the extent of the restrictions placed upon single Saudi Arabian mothers by the country's male guardianship system, the finest example of extreme patriarchy.

       Let us assume that a working single Saudi Arabian mother––after she has been granted permission to work by a male guardian, of course––earns enough money to support her children. She has the choice of enrolling them in the city's best school. She could easily save enough money for their futures. She may even choose to travel with them simply because she wants to. They are her children, after all.

      Unfortunately, choice is not an option for single Saudi Arabian mothers. Unless the children have a cooperative, responsible father who is in mutual agreement with their mother for the sake of their well-being, irresponsible fathers often opt to place children in incompetent schools due to free or meager tuition fees, despite the mother's capability of affording better educational options. Fathers also have the right to immediately "claim ownership" of the children, not through legal procedures, but by simply barging into the mother's home and taking the children away (otherwise known as kidnapping). According to the male guardianship, such insane measures are technically allowed (although certain courts may overrule such measures).

      Widowed mothers, who are often old in age, must begin relying on their son(s) after their husband's death. For instance, my paternal grandmother must ask for either my father or uncle's permission in order to travel, even having at nearly eight decades of age. My uncle has often expressed strong dislike towards this policy, saying that a responsible and mature woman should not require the constant permission of her youngest son, an opinion shared by other Saudi Arabian men alike. My maternal grandmother, on the other hand, has no sons nor brothers. Instead, travel permits must be approved by a government official––a strange man, no less. Honestly, the incompetence of the male guardianship system can be proved merely through that ridiculous example. The irony.

      What choice do these women have? What happens when the male guardianship system places the fates of these women into the hands of irresponsible men, unwilling to perform their duties that are so integral to the guardianship system? While the option of "switching" the rights of irresponsible husbands to responsible fathers or brothers does exist, the legal process is both lengthy and daunting, similarly to many other legal procedures in the country, which follow an often obscure and unnecessarily complex hierarchy.

      In some ways, the Saudi Arabian male guardianship system echoes the breadwinner system. Never mind the fact that both are male-dependent. Both are absolutely incompetent in today's demanding world, which demands for women to have a choice, whether it is the choice to work or to invest in the lives of their children––choices that are "basic", to say the least.